Hilarious Facebook Status SMS Text Message 2012

  • I once reported my roommate to INS. Turns out she’s clean,
    but I’m glad I did it.
  • I’m gonna grab one of those bulls over there and ride into town like a
    conquistador to challenge Hatcher to a duel, show him who the real tooth fairy is.
  • I guess if you spoke your mind, you’d be speechless, huh?
  • If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of
    jealous countries not talking to each other.
  • never judges a book by its cover. She uses the paragraph on the back
    it tells you what the story is about.
  • If I become a fan of myself, does that mean that every time I update my wall
    it will send an update to my wall?
  • remembers the day when blackberry and apple were just fruit.
  • I’m searching for my happy place. I could have sworn I
    left it next to the television..

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